May 30, 2006

Dancing Through Life

My friend Bethany and I went dancing last week at Lawrence University. I've always been a big fan of learning how to dance formal dances (swing, waltz, salsa, etc.). My freshmen year of college I lucked out and got into a social dance class for winter interim. It was a quick class but I learned a lot, some of which still sticks with me. The other day though, one of the young men who was running the swing dance event, Andrew, ended up teaching us some interesting thoughts which go beyond dancing.

"Dancing is like having a conversation with someone...hey why don't you come overe here, no wait I'll follow, how's the weather today?"

It seems silly, but I think Andrew's light tone (and his extremely humorous demonstration) reminded me that dance is one of those things we can take too seriously, and when we do, we lose the meaning to it. He essentially wanted us to think and realize that dancing is casual, no matter how formal it is, or how 'graceful' you should be. I applaud any number of person who can get out on a dance floor and just lose it, yet enjoy themselves. When dancing with someone else, it's the same concept...have fun with it, keep it casual.

"You need to pay attention to what she's saying when you dance."

Good dances aren't obviously sitting out on the dance floor having loud conversations with each other about where they are going to go next, or what move their going to attempt. It's because they learn how to communicate and listen through a variety of means. A simple touch, a simple look, a simple respositioning can all convey different things. But the communication is still of outmost importance. Even though there is one person who is leading, you still need to practice give and take with your patner to make sure they are in synch with you.

"A typical dance lesson takes hour and hours...the goal is not to give up."

I've talked a lot the past couple of months about time and patience and how they fit into life. Dance obvsiouly is one of those activities that you just can't learn over night, and if you want to enjoy and understand it, it takes slow patient steps. This also caused me to realize that there are some people who do have natural gifts and talents in certain areas. What has really hit me though is that they too still need to practice and work hard to maintain their level of mastery and confidence.

"You should be able to drop your hand, without worrying about her falling over."

There's a move in the swing dance we were learning where hold onto the other person's hand, but as I soon learned, you're really only sort of hanging on to it. There's some small amount of tension, but each person should be individually balanced, so that when the tension breaks, neither person falls over. What a powerful thought about couplehood. It still includes sharing a tether with somoene, but that each of you are stable enough that you if need to let go for a short time, both people will be ok. Letting go is not a bad thing.

"See that's what's great about most of these moves, the guy isn't doing any of the work."

Yes I threw this one in here because Andrew was really cutting us up at this point. Again it just made me laugh. And it made me appreciate how good a teacher he was since he ahd the ability to break down dancing and make it light and easy without minimizing what we were doing.

My hat off to Andrew and the rest of his Swing Dance Club at Lawrence University. I hope they continue to have fun and success. And thanks for teaching me some great things about life!

PS: Of course this is the big NACURH weekend, and I want to wish the UW Oshkosh delegation much love and luck as they will attempt to bid to host NACURH 2007. One small step guys, one small step!

pb